//
you're reading...
Satire

Man detained for blindly following traffic rules in Delhi, India


A high alert has been sounded by the Delhi Traffic Police after this incident shocked the department

A high alert has been sounded by the Delhi Traffic Police after this incident shocked the department

An unidentified 40-year-old male has been detained by Delhi police for suspicious behaviour after he was caught following all the traffic rules on the road in the national capital. This is the rarest of the rare behaviours witnessed on Delhi roads, authorities confirm.

Addressing a press conference,  traffic inspector Mr. Hafta Ram gave a detailed account of how the “suspect” was nabbed: “I was driving home after duty in my civilian clothes when I saw this car performing strange antics on the road. The driver was driving in a proper lane, he was giving indicator while turning and as well as while changing lanes, and surprisingly he gave correct indication each time!

“Not only this, whenever the traffic lights turned red, he stopped at the faded zebra crossings to let the pedestrians, who were already crossing the road even when the traffic light was green, cross the road. And to top it all, he was well within the speed limit even on an empty stretch of road,” he added.

Hafta Ram claimed that such behaviour was highly uncommon in Delhi so he stopped the “suspect” for questioning. Even though Hafta was in civilian clothes and demanded to check the papers, the “suspect” didn’t make any phone call to anybody.

“He didn’t even mention about his father, or about his mother-in-law, not even once!” a visibly shocked Hafta Ram recounted the vivid details to the reporters, “At this point, I got suspicious that this guy must have something to hide, and detained him to investigate this matter further.”

While police are still interrogating the “offender,” sources confirm that the department was more concerned about the “offence” than the “offender.”

A constable, on the condition of anonymity, told reporters: “What will happen to us if everyone starts following traffic rules? I will have to start withdrawing money from my salary account after all these years to pay for my expenses!”

While the common man was desperate to find out who among them had become so uncommon, political parties, desperate to get away from the daily dose of scams, have jumped on this opportunity to take the common man’s attention away from corruption.

Congress General Secretary, Mr. Rahul Gandhi said, “99% of the people are still breaking traffic rules, 1% have somehow learned them. We blame internet for it as we have ensured nobody in India teaches traffic rules properly to people, so they must have learned them through some website. I will request Sibal ji to block some more websites to sort out this problem.”

BJP, meanwhile, has blamed PM Manmohan Singh and Montek Singh Ahluwalia for this. A BJP spokesperson said: “The economy is in doldrums and inflation is increasing day by day. Aam Aadmi doesn’t have the money to pay for challans or bribe traffic police anymore, so they have started following traffic rules. The PM must resign, taking moral responsibility for this incident.”

On the other hand, the head of the newly formed “yet to be named party,” Mr. Arvind Kejriwal, has assured that he will protest against this arrest on the Parliament Street. He has asked people to stop paying any traffic fines till transport minister C.P. Joshi submits his resignation.

Investigators are trying to ascertain if the detained man is the same guy who had switched off his mobile phone during a movie screening in a West Delhi multiplex.

Source: Faking News – Man detained for blindly following traffic rules in Delhi (SATIRE)
 

About Craig Hill

Teacher and Writer. Writing has been cited in New York Times, BBC, Fox News, Aljazeera, Philippines Star, South China Morning Post, National Interest, news.com.au, Wikipedia and others.

Discussion

2 thoughts on “Man detained for blindly following traffic rules in Delhi, India

  1. Loved the piece. It is satire at its best!

    Posted by Sapna | January 13, 2014, 22:09
  2. Oh, the horror! 😉

    Posted by swabby429 | January 14, 2014, 00:26

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

If you liked what you just read, click "Subscribe" to become a follower of the Craig Hill site. You will receive an email each time a new post is published.

Join 17,663 other followers

An archive of all my old posts

Follow me on Twitter

Most Recent Posts Post on My Blog About China: China News

Chinese drones now almost a daily appearance over Taiwan

Chinese drones now almost a daily appearance over Taiwan

The Chinese military has intensified its drone incursions into the skies above Taiwan with almost daily flights of combat and reconnaissance unmanned aerial vehicles (UAVs). Taiwan’s Defense Ministry said a People’s Liberation Army (PLA) TB-001 drone was spotted crossing the median line of the Taiwan Strait, the de facto boundary between the island and China’s […]

India says disengagement along disputed area with China to be completed by September 12

India says disengagement along disputed area with China to be completed by September 12

India’s foreign ministry said on Friday that disengagement along a disputed border area with China will be completed by Sept. 12. Both countries began disengaging from the Gogra-Hot Springs border area in the western Himalayas on Thursday, over two years after clashes at the frontier strained diplomatic ties. The disengagement comes ahead of a meeting […]

How to make EVs without China’s supply chain

How to make EVs without China’s supply chain

Two electrifying moves in recent weeks have the potential to ignite electric vehicle demand in the United States. First, Congress passed the Inflation Reduction Act, expanding federal tax rebates for EV purchases. Then California approved rules to ban the sale of new gasoline-powered cars by 2035. The Inflation Reduction Act extends the Obama-era EV tax […]

Anti-India forces: Techniques and agendas exposed

Anti-India forces: Techniques and agendas exposed

In the post-cold war era, India has moved from a policy of non-alignment to a policy of multi-alignment. This means that India has friendly relations with almost all-powerful and developing nations. Today India is carving out a unique path for itself. Such an approach provides prominence and exposes India to the harmful behind-curtain activities by […]

Taiwan’s Kinmen serves as a reminder of China’s aggression

Taiwan’s Kinmen serves as a reminder of China’s aggression

Taiwan’s frontline island of Kinmen was once again in the headlines when President Tsai Ing-wen paid tribute this week to the soldiers and civilians who “operated in solidarity and safeguarded Taiwan” 64 years ago. On Aug. 23, 1958 mainland Chinese troops attacked Kinmen in a key battle that marked the beginning of the Second Taiwan […]

Terrorism: The glue that holds China and Pakistan together 

Terrorism: The glue that holds China and Pakistan together 

The father of communism, Karl Marx, once famously said — “We have no compassion, and we ask no compassion from you. When our turn comes, we shall not make excuses for the terror”. This statement summarises how terrorism and communism go hand in hand. Maoist China alone destroyed between 44.5 to 72 million lives. During […]

‘New normal’ across the Taiwan Strait as China threat looms ever closer

‘New normal’ across the Taiwan Strait as China threat looms ever closer

China is attempting to establish a “new normal” across the Taiwan Strait, eroding self-ruled Taiwan’s territorial control and increasing the threat of a strike with each military sortie, officials and analysts say. Beijing has ramped up military maneuvers in the 110-mile (180-kilometer) wide stretch of water that separates Taiwan from mainland China — and the […]

When Beijing was burning, Xi was playing personal games 

When Beijing was burning, Xi was playing personal games 

A great fire destroyed Rome for six days in the summer of AD 64. Famous Roman historian of that time, Tacitus, recorded that 70 percent of the city was destroyed and half of the city’s residents were displaced. Roman ruler Nero was accused of being indifferent, ineffective, and careless. The end result of this neglect […]

China would re-educate Taiwan in event of reunification

China would re-educate Taiwan in event of reunification

Once China achieves its professed goal of establishing control over Taiwan, a process of “re-education” of the island’s population would follow, according to China’s Ambassador to France Lu Shaye. The ambassador was speaking on French television channel BFM TV on Wednesday night, when he said a majority of the Taiwanese population actually wanted to be […]

Sri Lanka’s economic crisis is a political sabotage

Sri Lanka’s economic crisis is a political sabotage

Sri Lanka’s present state confirms the famous statement: “Insanity is doing the same thing repeatedly and expecting different results.” Sri Lankans have been repeating the mistakes of choosing the politicians Rajapaksas again and again. It is confirmed that there were unaccounted payments that the Chinese were liberal with during project negotiations with the island nation. They were paid […]

%d bloggers like this: