Study suggests Stonehenge was prehistoric McDonald’s

Once thought to be a burial ground, ancient temple, or work of alien lifeforms, the Stonehenge monument may have been the world’s first fast food eatery.

This is thanks to the discovery of a perfectly intact McDonald’s hamburger unearthed at the base of a massive monolith this week.

Top archaeologists in the field say the stale sandwich is proof that prehistoric man worshipped the Big Mac, likely later dying out because of poor dietary choices and Smilodons that were also “lovin’ it.”

Some detractors say it’s impossible to know if the burger is truly centuries old given the complete lack of decay usually needed for carbon dating, though the team that disinterred the patty is already on the short list for the Nobel prize.

As of press time, a lone palaeontologist was mounting a preposterous campaign aiming to tie the artefact to a busload of obese octogenarians recently seen touring the historic Stonehenge site.

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